Waiting for Godot to Leave

Yes, he was the most important person in my life, but I had had enough of him. You couldn't fake your way through a rehearsal with Jiman.  He was the most exacting and challenging director I had ever had.  He was the first person who showed me that acting required the engagement of the whole self - physical, spiritual, intellectual and emotional.  He was my mentor, but I was getting a bit tired of him.  After all, he was not the most balanced of men, and his psychological insight and charisma gave him the makings of a cult leader, a role he would have latched on to with gusto, particularly when it came to the attention the women in the cast gave him.  In fact, if we had been rehearsing in rural Guyana and not suburban Missouri, I have no doubt he would have been sleeping with all of us - at least with the ladies - and sooner or later we'd be drinking the Kool-Aid and worshipping little carved wooden mini-Jimans in our spare time. And so, while he had brought...

I once wrote that Hope is more despised than Chastity, that if you're not cynical and disdainful, you're not hip and modern. But there's a virtue that seems even less in vogue than Hope, and that is Magnanimity. What is Magnanimity?  Well, even Wikipedia gets it right ... Magnanimity (derived from the Latin roots magn- great, and animus , mind, literally means greatly generous [my note: no, its etymology means great of spirit or great of soul ]) is the virtue of being great of mind and heart. It encompasses, usually, a refusal to be petty, a willingness to face danger, and actions for noble purposes. Its antithesis is pusillanimity . Now pusillanimity is what I would call low-balling, or flying under the radar.  It's living your life as many men (and women) do, and as I did before my conversion, seeking cheap casual sex, easy money without hard work, comfort, and the means to satisfy your desires without getting noticed and without getting hurt.  It is a kin...